17 December 2013

A Quote for the Nighthawks


I just found that a couple of minutes ago, and I want to share it with as many people as I can. Isn't it so touching? Don't you feel so swallowed up in it? 

I feel like I am deeply in the question years. Any decision I make is hanging free in the air with no clues or hints--just dangling and waiting. I make choices that I do not always believe in, but they are the only choices and sometimes you just have to go with your gut. It is just my life right now and there is nothing I can do about it. I just have to sit and wonder and wait. 

Maybe it's my age, maybe it's my strange living situation, or maybe it's just me. But a few years ago, when I packed up my bags and moved to a small school to study writing, and only writing, and to sit outside with friends and smoke cigarettes and talk about books, and to fall in love with everyone who passed by, and to go to every concert, every movie, every party... those were the times of certainty. I questioned things, but not the way I question them now. And they were different questions, young girl questions. I don't think I realized how firm everything was for me back then. 

It feels good lost, though. Not all the time, but as a whole. Like a spinning, vibrant buzz that fills your ears and drips down your spine. 

Anyway. I used to listen to this album when I felt like I understood the life I was living and it would feel wrong if I didn't share it with you now. It's daydreaming music, but you probably wouldn't be here if you weren't a daydreamer too. 

Let me know what you think, if you like. 



7 comments:

  1. fucking love broken social scene. they have the same effect on me at this point in my life, a year from graduation (2nd year senior for the win!) and losing the certainty i've had throughout my college years. i'm beginning the years of questioning as the ground i so surely stood upon feels like its cracking and falling from under me. thank you for sharing that quote!! it is so nice to name the things that you've been sensing. p.s have you seen Half Nelson? You probably have, but Broken Social Scene is a part of the soundtrack and it is unbelievably diviiiiiiiiine

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  2. Love the quote, and it's so fitting for my year of answers.. after a couple of years full of chalenges and uncertanty, as I write the final paper for college about migration and identity in literature, I've realized I an being able to slowly answer questions that lingered for years, getting ready for those that are to come! I never comment, but I really like how you express your view of the world and always check on your blog. Kisses from Chile

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    1. Thank you so much. I'm so glad you read this little blog :)

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  3. i know exactly what you mean about falling in love with everyone that walked by. i used to fall in love with strangers all of the time - my imagination getting the best of me and creating stories and history when there was none there. :)

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  4. That was my favourite album my senior year of high school. Every time I hear it I drift back to remembering how carefree my life was. I was so carefree, yet so certain. I felt like I could conquer the world. So many good memories, but I'm enjoying this very different phase of life too.

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